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Tuesday, September 4, 2007

TOO ASHKENAZ

So now that I'm off the Jdate circuit, I'm back on the good old fashioned set up scene. The other day a friend asked me to stop by his apartment to meet a potential set up candidate. Actually, what he said was, "I have this really cute 27 year old in my apartment. Get your ass over here now!" Apparently this chick is the babysitter of his wife's friend's kid and there was some big play date fiesta going on at his place. I was running late for a previous engagement, but he lives nearby so I figured I'd do a quick pop in to say hello to this babysitter, and then let the "yentas that be" arrange any potential setup if there was any interest.

I popped in, said hi, and that was that. "Really cute" was a severe overstatement, but she was okay looking and marginally friendly. I would have gone out with her if she were into it, but she wasn't! Why?...Because I was "Too Ashkenaz and light skinned looking" for her. She's some kind of Persian Jewess and likes her men dark and, I don't know... more Persian looking. Who the hell knows?

This was definitely the first time I've been rejected for being "Too Ashkenaz." I understand that people have very specific tastes and looks that they're into, but I found the "too Ashkenaz and light skinned" thing sort of interesting. Did she look at me and see this?:


Or was it more of a George Jefferson/ Tom Willis thing, and she saw me as some pasty faced honkey, like this:



Admittedly, I was kind of relieved that she wasn't into it because a 27 year old babysitter isn't exactly my ideal woman, and at least I wouldn't be the one who'd catch shit from my friend for not giving it a chance.

I wish her luck finding her dark, handsome, Persian prince. As for me, maybe I'll have to hit the tanning salon or get one of those spray on tans so maybe I'll have a better chance with the next chick who likes her men less pigment challenged.

17 comments:

Isaac said...

Yeah, dude. The ethnic types really like to stick with their own kind. First it was Russians, now Persians.

Linda said...

Persians are VERY close knit. Wouldn't take it even remotely personally.

yingerman said...

I know an ashkenazi Chasid-strayed girl who married a sfaradi guy and it was rosy at first but as time goes by the culteral differences creep in.
I'm not being racist just realistic!

Max said...

Persians ain't a crowd you wanna get involved with, if you're not one of them.

Michelle said...

She's probably looking for some hairy, dark skinned guy in the diamond business so they can have hairy, dark skinned kids together to eventually take over the business.

del said...

Pity. Her father was probably loaded! Look at the bright side -- you got a great linbe to open up your next Internet personals ad!

By the way, my parents are a Sephardic/Ashkenazic mixture. Time was when the Ashkenazim treated Sephardim like they were inferior.

Then again, don't judge all (Persians, Yemenites, Russians, South Africans) by one bad apple.

~ Sarah ~ said...

How superficial. It's always interesting to hear the odd reasons why people choose not to date someone.


(Recently discovered your blog. Very entertaining. Thanks for sharing!)

Marc F. said...

Welcome, Sarah. This chick's reasoning is perfectly explained in the blog entitled, "DUMBING IT DOWN PART II," if you haven't had a chance to read it.

yozz said...

Many ashkenazim don't want sefardim and vice versa. I personally don't want a sefaradi girl. They are different, and often less cultured or intelligent or both. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Persians are known among other sefaradim for the tendency to be stingy. They'll willingly take for their own group but will not give to the outsiders. Did you ever try gentile women? You might save your children from the burden of being Jewish!

C said...

Wow, so many insenstive comments from the responders, remember what Marc said before Jdate not Jhate.

Personally I think pasty is pretty attractive. :)

Yozz said...

Well, to quote Stewie from Family Guy, "I don't hate Lois - I just want her not to be" Just kidding.

Anonymous said...

hey, just found your blog recently, too.. many of the comments on this post are pretty offensive. My ancestry is Syrian which is pretty much the same way the Persians are in that they're a close knit community, work for the family business, etc. but I don't think it's fair to generalize and say that they're less cultured or intelligent and stingy. Though it's true, we usually like to stick together, lots of my friends are ashkenaz and we love joking about/learning from our cultural differences. You just gotta judge each person for who they are, and not stereotype based on their ethnicity.

-Rachel

yozz said...

Well, I tried speaking once to an American, Orthodox Syrian Rabbi, a Rosh Yeshiva of a respected yeshiva, and he had to pretend he didn't understand me - he talked to me through a middle man - "What does he want?", he said, "tell him ..."

Marc F. said...

I'm sure there are plenty of blogs where the merits of being Ashkenaz over Sephardic or vice versa can be discussed. This, however, ain't one of 'em. Let's limit the comments to the subject at hand...why I got rejected for being pasty faced.

If this continues to turn into a my brand of Judaism is better than yours, I'll reject the comments so don't bother posting.

Sa said...

It's not the girls who reject you, it's the unknown mystery of nature itself. Nature wants to reveal to you its secrets, but you don't want to see; you close your eyes. The girls want you. Read them, read their minds, and give them what they want.

Anonymous said...

Just saw the jdate profile of a lady who's ideal match is "not too jewy". Now that's fussy, especially on jdate.

Rafi said...

Wow, what a turn around. Usually it's your too dark , being Sephardi and all.