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Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Grandmas

So you know the old cliche of getting a fake call during a date telling you your grandma died so that you could leave? Well here's an interesting variation on that theme. This weekend I went out with a woman who insisted on having her phone on the table during the date. Apparently, grandma was in dire straits over at Mount Sinai, and she wanted to know the second anything happened. What followed were no fewer than 7 phone calls that she answered during the date. As I listened in, I learned that grandma had had some sort of stroke and was touch and go. I told her that if she needed to go to the hospital, I would totally understand, but she insisted on staying and taking those calls. She claimed that her sister was at the hospital and she didn't want to see her. Apparently, they hate each other. Instead, she was having her mother call her with the play by play, as I sat there having to listen to this chick tell her mother what a bitch her sister was, and how she was only at the hospital because she felt guilty. "Where was she when grandpa was dying? All of a sudden she gives a shit?," I heard her whine.

Now I'm not one for soap operas. In fact, I had my fill this month when I went to visit my own grandmother in Brooklyn and we watched "One Life To Live" together. It was on when I came to visit, and she can't miss it so I was stuck watching horribly written and poorly acted dialogue while my grandmother explained to me who was banging whom.

So by the time I heard this woman go off on how there was no way her sister was getting grandma's jewelry, if she kicked, I knew it was time for my exit. I got her to put the phone down long enough to tell her that I really needed to go, but that I hoped everything worked out with her grandmother. Her response to my attempted exit and well wishes was an angry, "SO GO!" And I did.

She left me a semi-apologetic voicemail the next day explaining how she wasn't angry at me and that I shouldn't take it personally. She suggested we try another date. I thought about it for a while, but decided if I want that kind of drama in my life, I'll DVR "One Life To Live." At least then, I'll have more to talk about with my own grandmother.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hope you didn't shave your balls for that!...I wouldn't give her a second chance either.

Anonymous said...

Nice that she called, I'd MAYBE give her a second shot, but you have to decide that for yourself. Her behavior the first time certainly demonstrated very poor social skills.

Anonymous said...

If she knew she was going to be on the phone all night, she never should have gone on the date. I'm with Mo. Next!

Anonymous said...

just curious, do you go on any normal dates in between blog entries? I find it hard, no make that impossible, to believe that every woman in NYC is angry, rude and unpleasant, because that is all that you date.

Marc said...

anonymous,

I've commented on this before, but I will again for your sake. I've gone on plenty of dates with perfectly nice women that didn't work out for one reason or another. I don't blog about those because they don't make for interesting reading material. So not every women in NYC is rude, angry and unpleasant. Just the ones I blog about.

Samantha said...

This made me laugh out loud! I agree completely with Linda.

Anonymous said...

Do any of your dates know you have a blog? Does the idea that they might cost you sleepless knights?

Anonymous said...

Talking on your cell phone during a date is rude, period! If things were that "dramatic" for her at that time, she should have rescheduled the date with you. And then she had the nerve to be mad at you when you left, give me a break!

Anonymous said...

There are a couple of up sides to going on a second date with her:

1) If she's really really really sorry, this might have some, er, fringe benefits (depending on how attracted to her you are).

2) If the date goes badly, you have a topic for another blog post! LOL

So did you call her back and tell her whether or not you were interested in that second date?

Marc said...

Nope. Never called her back. I think she'll get over it, though.