I sat in my apartment last weekend wondering what it is I'm looking for in a relationship. Things are going well with the Colombian, but while she's back home visiting her family, I've had some time to reflect. What do I want from a woman? Is it companionship, good conversation, someone who'll laugh at my jokes, a hand job on the sofa while watching Family Guy reruns together? Well, yes. I want all those things, but what else? There has to be something more. Otherwise, why bother dating? I could be perfectly happy sitting on my sofa alone, laughing at my own jokes and watching cartoons. And when it comes to hand jobs, no woman has ever given me one as good as the ones I've given myself.
While I struggled with my dilemma, fate, assisted by a packed subway car, forced me to sit next to a man whose wisdom pointed me in the right direction. He told me that his girlfriend is currently doing time for shooting her best friend in the stomach, and I figured who better to offer advice about love than a man with such impeccable taste. "The problem today," he theorized, "is that don't nobody want what Martin and Gina had. Ain't no mo' faithfulness and shit in the world."
I wondered to myself who Martin and Gina were. Perhaps they were tragic lovers in a Shakespearean play I hadn't read, or in an opera by Verdi I hadn't seen. I feared seeming ignorant when I asked, "Martin and Gina?" But the relationship expert I had the fortune of sitting next to looked at me without the slightest hint of judgment and said, "Yeah, you know Martin and Gina. They was perfect together." And then it hit me. Of course! How could I have overlooked one of the great couples of our time? I was looking for examples of the perfect relationship in literature and art, and in my own head, when all I needed to do was turn on BET.
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While I struggled with my dilemma, fate, assisted by a packed subway car, forced me to sit next to a man whose wisdom pointed me in the right direction. He told me that his girlfriend is currently doing time for shooting her best friend in the stomach, and I figured who better to offer advice about love than a man with such impeccable taste. "The problem today," he theorized, "is that don't nobody want what Martin and Gina had. Ain't no mo' faithfulness and shit in the world."
I wondered to myself who Martin and Gina were. Perhaps they were tragic lovers in a Shakespearean play I hadn't read, or in an opera by Verdi I hadn't seen. I feared seeming ignorant when I asked, "Martin and Gina?" But the relationship expert I had the fortune of sitting next to looked at me without the slightest hint of judgment and said, "Yeah, you know Martin and Gina. They was perfect together." And then it hit me. Of course! How could I have overlooked one of the great couples of our time? I was looking for examples of the perfect relationship in literature and art, and in my own head, when all I needed to do was turn on BET.
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9 comments:
Yeah... I had to look Martin and Gina up. LoL NOW I get it!
As for your hand job situation, I have to wonder how many men actually feel that way!
Men, please chime in. Ms. Random and I would love to know.
Martin and Gina is a reference to the television sitcom "Martin", which by the way was never on BET, but was actually a FOX show(imagine that black people on a television channel other than BET!!!).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_%28TV_series%29
Anon- the BET reference was me exercising poetic license to make a point, but thanks for the info.
I am noticing that there are no comments regarding my question. What does that mean...
All I can say is WOW! I also don't have any comments relating to the subject at hand but I think it's hilarious that you've never heard of the TV show Martin. I'm sure had the gentleman said Ozzie & Harriet, you probably would've been able to relate more.
FYI, the comedian Martin Lawrence not only had a television show but he was in a number of movies. You may have heard of the movie Bad Boys which also starred an actor you may have heard of Will Smith (Men in Black, Independence Day, i Robot). Prior to becoming a movie star, he also starred in a HIT comedy series called "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air" that aired on NBC.
In the case you were unaware, African Americans do appear in roles on mainstream networks, not just BET. That's all!
I'm thinking people don't understand your sense of humor. LoL I love all the advice you are getting regarding who Martin is though. Hilarious!
So you never concluded, what is it that you want from a woman?
Wow an honest man's thoughts....interesting and enjoyable to read ...thanks for blogging! I was always you shouldn't do for a man what he can do for himself , it's pointless..so I never give hand jobs!
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